오래전에 캐나다 뱅쿠버 지역에서, 일부 다처제의 범법 여부를 따지는 재판이 있었던 기억이 오늘 칼럼을 읽으면서 기억에 떠오른다.
5대양 6대주를 여행하다보면 이러한 일부다처제도가, 특히 Muslim지역에서 생활화 되여 있음을 목격하게되여있다.
민주주의 정치 체제하에 있는 나라들, 특히 Eritria, India, Philliphines, Singapore, Sri Lanka에서도 종교적으로 Muslim에 속하는 집단은 실질적으로 일부다처제를 하고 있으나, 법의 저촉을 받지 않는다고 한다.
http://lifemeansgo.blogspot.ca/2016/01/india-tour-old-cityamber-fortjalmahal.html
또한 아시아 지역에서는 일부 돈많고, 성욕이 강한 부자남자들에게는 이러한 축첩제도가 있는곳이 있다라고 기록에 나와있다.
그런데,세상에 이런일이 현재에도, 그것도 세계문명의 첨단을 걷고 있다는 미국에서, 벌어지고 있다니.... 길거리를 걷다가, 어깨만 스쳐도 "I'm sorry"를 입에 달고 사는 사람들이 바로 북미의 미국과 캐나다에 모여사는 사회다. 국가에서는 이들 사교집단의 리더를 붙잡아 재판에 부치곤 하지만, 그들은 종교적 의식이라고 주장하여 재판에서 공방을 벌이고 있다. 신기한것은 이렇게 집단생활하고 있는 여성들도 권리라고 주장한다는 것이다.
이런사회의 한곳에서, 아직도 일부 다처제가 성행하고 있고, 이로 인해서 전문가들의 연구에 따르면, 일부다처제의 사회에서는 유전자문제가 크다고 걱정이다.
궁금한점은, 일부다처제의 사회에서, 어떻게 많은 여인을 아내로 맞아 들일수 있을까?라는 의문이 생긴다. 태어날때의 성비는 거의 비슷할텐데..... 10여년전에 그곳을 탈출하여 현재 그들이 사악한 사회로 여기는, 즉 우리같은 사람들이 살고 있는 사회의 한곳에서 살고있는 Faith Bistline, 그녀의 설명에 따르면, 틴에이저가된,호기심 많은 사내아이들은 말썽을 피우는게 발각되면그들 사회에서 축출당한다고 설명한다.
그녀의 설명에 따르면, 그녀의 어머니는 3명이고, 형재 자매는 자그만치 27명이나 됐다고 한다. 그녀의 아버지는 그녀가 13세 였을때, 사이비 종교집단의 사회에서 쫒겨 나서 그이후로는 만난적이 없는데, 그가 쫒겨난지 6개월후 그녀의 할아버지 장례식때 꼭 한번 봤었는데, 아버지는 자기가 낳은 형제 자매들을 잘 기억하지 못하고 있었다고 설명한다.
BBC가 보도한 내용 일부를 옮겨본다.
미국 대륙의 중서부지역에 있는 Grand Cayon으로 부터 동북쪽으로 약 140킬로 떨어져 있는, 식물들이 살지못하는, 붉은 암벽으로 둘러싸인, 버려진 땅이면서도 경치가 좋은 협곡에 Short Creek Community가 자리하고있다.
이곳이 바로 FLDS( Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints)의 본부가 있는 곳인데, 이사이비 종파는 20세기 초까지만 해도 몰몬교의 한 지파였었다고 한다. 그들은 현대문명을 등지고 옛생활 방식을 고집하여, 텔레비, 인터넷, 그리고 옛날 의복( 여인들은 긴치마)을 입고사는, 일부다처제의 본향으로, 한남자가 여러명의 여자를 아내로 맞아 생활한다.
수많은 스캔달로 이사이비교주, Warren Jeffs는 현재 감옥에 갇혀있다. 그러나 이곳의 쌍둥이마을, 즉 Hildale과 Cololado시에서는 아직도, 100여년전에 마을이 생겼을 당시의 생활풍습을 그대로 전수하여 살고 있다.
BBC Future가 이번주에 이사실을 보도 하면서, 오랫동안 지켜져온 일부다처제로 인해서, 심각한 유전자 문제가 계속발생해 왔음도 발견하게된다.(The polygamous town facing genetic disaster)
Short Creek의 일부다처제 마을에서 사는 사람들은 어떻게 살고 있을까?라는 생각을 떨칠수가 없어서, BBC Future는 사이비 종교집단마을에서 탈출하여, 보통사람으로서의 삶을 살고있는Faith Bistline로 부터 겪었던 삶의 얘기를 들어 보기로 했다. 그녀의 첫마디는 도망나오기로 결정하던날 저녁의 긴장됐던 순간을 포함한 얘기를 들었다
그녀가 전해주는 가족 얘기.
"나는 3명의 어머니와 27명의 형제 자매가 있다 - 내 짐작으로는 가장 큰 오빠는 42세고, 내가 떠나올때 막내는 4세였는데, 지금쯤은 10세가 됐을것 같다. 내가 13세때 내 아버지는 집단에서 축출됐었고, 그가 떠난지 6개월만에 할아버지가 돌아가셨을때 한번 만난적이 있었으나, 그는 자기 자식들인 우리 형제들을 알아보지 못해 이해가 되지 않았었다."
"Colorado City의 많은 성인들은 일부다처제 결혼생활을 한다. 남자들은 최소한 3명 이상의 여성과 결혼을 해야 그들이 믿는 천상으로 갈수 있다고 믿는것 같다. 그러나 모두가 그렇게 생각치는 않는것 같기도 하다. 어떤 남자들은 한여자 또는 두여자만을 아내로 삼고 산다는것을 깊이 생각해 보기 바란다."
"Colorado City의 많은 성인들은 일부다처제 결혼생활을 한다. 남자들은 최소한 3명 이상의 여성과 결혼을 해야 그들이 믿는 천상으로 갈수 있다고 믿는것 같다. 그러나 모두가 그렇게 생각치는 않는것 같기도 하다. 어떤 남자들은 한여자 또는 두여자만을 아내로 삼고 산다는것을 깊이 생각해 보기 바란다."
What was the daily routine like there?
“So we had to get up at 5:00 and then we had a family class where my father would read us one of the prophet’s sermons. After that we would all kneel down in a circle to pray. Then one of the mothers would cook breakfast and my father would go to work. Some of my mums worked so they would go to work too, while one stayed behind with the children. Then I’d have school all day and in the evening we’d have another family class after dinner – then repeat. Every day was the same.
Would you have been married off eventually?
“Oh yeah, definitely. There was a system. In order for someone to get married, their father would have to go to Warren Jeffs and say, ‘Hey, my son or daughter is ready,’ and then he’d place them in a marriage. If your husband wasn’t married to someone already, he’d probably be given another wife eventually.”
If some men have several wives, does that mean others don’t have any?
“It works out because a lot of the younger boys get kicked out when they’re teenagers. Some of them start watching movies and these types of things aren’t allowed. That leaves more girls than there are guys.”
Why was your father kicked out?
“He was actually never told why. But after Warren Jeffs was arrested, the police released all his records – he took notes of everything – and we discovered that he had a dream that my dad had turned him into the FBI. We think that was the reason.”
Have any of your brothers left?
“Yeah, this happened to three of my brothers. One of them actually went to college after being out for a few years – he studied biophysical engineering – but he was older. And there’s two in Los Angeles. One of them is still trying to repent because he wants to go back into the religion. Then the other one, he was like that for a little bit, but now he’s kind of slowly adapting to the outside world. You’re not allowed any contact with your family after you leave, so I didn’t know any of this until I left.”
Did you ever question the religion?
“They would always tell us in church, if we had any questions to ‘put them on the shelf’. What they meant was to just not worry, because Warren Jeffs knew what he was doing. I don’t think people gossiped much at all and if they did they were usually found out.
“I thought that I was blessed because I happened to be born into the FLDS. We were always told that it was very wicked outside – I thought that normal people were miserable with their lives.
“When I was trying to decide if I should leave, I called my brother who left about six years before I did. I asked if he regretted his decision and he said, ‘No, it’s the best thing I’ve ever done.’ So that’s when I was like wait a minute… I started questioning everything.”
When did you decide to leave?
“I met my boyfriend after he started a rumour that we were dating. Initially I just wanted his phone number because I was mad – dating was against the rules. He had left the FLDS by that point, but he’d still come back to Colorado City to see friends. Anyway eventually we made plans to meet up.
“My house had a high brick wall around it and so he parked so that he was hidden behind it. I snuck out but it didn’t take long before my family realised I was missing. Five of my brothers jumped into their truck and came after me. My boyfriend was super worried.
“My brothers called me and demanded that I pull over – but when I asked what they were going to do they said they wanted to break his neck. Anyway we started driving really, really fast and it was getting dark. We went around a corner and just about had an accident. I was scared, so I asked him to slow down and I jumped out. Then my brothers took me home.
“The next day, they took me to their office to help with some data entry. I managed to get hold of my boyfriend – who I had still only met a couple of times – and he gave me a secret phone so that we could talk. I hid it in my bra. Later that night I turned it on and a message popped up saying, ‘I love you’.”
How did you escape?
“A few months later I’d been kicked out of church – but not the religion – because this is how they punish people. My family started to reject me. It was very hurtful and that’s when I knew I had to leave.
“My boyfriend drove up in the middle of the night, parked behind the brick wall and shut off the headlights. It was a small car with five other people, but I managed to get a few bags in there. I brought all the journals I had been writing, a box of letters, three pairs of jeans and three shirts. I left all of my polygynous clothes, except the dress that I was wearing. I was so brainwashed by that point, on the way out of town I was shocked that I wasn’t struck by lightning.”
What was the biggest adjustment?
“Everything was different outside, but I was trying to fit in. It sounds silly but it took ages to work out what to do with my hair – we had always worn it pulled back, so I was like, ‘How do girls get their hair to look so pretty, all around their faces?’
“Make-up, that was another thing. I could not for the life of me figure out how to get it on without getting it all over my eyelids. Oh and it took a whole year to get used to seeing myself in pants. I felt like I was very attractive all of a sudden – I had legs!”
Do you agree with polygynous marriage?
“No, no way. I just don’t think it’s fair. In the polygamous marriages that I saw, the man was always in charge and the women – they are lower, I guess. That just doesn’t make sense to me. I believe in equality of the sexes and I don’t think that in polygyny they are equal.”
http://www.bbc.com/future/
